- It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, but that’s not high praise. Hollywood’s latest attempt at a video game adaptation is just decent enough for adults to get through the 99 minute run time without falling asleep.

Full Disclosure: My expectations were about as low as they could be coming into this one. There was nowhere to go but up. Sometimes, that’s a positive though. I played the original Sonic the Hedgehog on Sega Genesis a bunch way back in the day. I also watched the animated series over a bowl of Captain Crunch before kindergarten when I was a kid, but I certainly wasn’t clamoring for a live-action adaptation of the ultra-thin source material. Video game movies are a train wreck nine times out of ten, so I definitely wasn’t excited.

Review

I was expecting Sonic the Hedgehog to be the worst movie of the year. On our 2020 preview podcast (which you listen to by clicking here), I predicted that it would sweep the Razzies next year. As it turns out, it wasn’t even the worst movie to open on Valentine’s Day of 2020. That dubious honor belongs to Fantasy Island. (Review forthcoming.) I wouldn’t call this movie “fun” or even “entertaining”, but at least it was bearable. Given the much-publicized hullabaloo surrounding the design of the titular character, this movie seemed doomed from the start. The redesign of Sonic cost over $10 million for Paramount Pictures, as well as a delay of several months for its release. That would usually be a death knell for any movie, but Sonic the Hedgehog seems to be the little video game movie that could.

At its best, Sonic is cute and even charming at times. At its worst, it’s just mind-achingly dull. For a movie all about going fast, it takes a long, long time to pick up the pace. There’s a ton of setup for not much payoff. There’s a good 15-20 minutes of exposition and backstory, all lazily explained through voiceover, and almost none of it is actually necessary to tell the story. Sonic is an anthropomorphic blue hedgehog that can travel at supersonic speeds. He’s being hunted by the nefarious Dr. Robotnik (Jim Carrey), a mad scientist hellbent on unlocking the source of Sonic’s unique powers and harnessing it for his own uses. There. I did it. That’s all you need to know going in. I accomplished in two sentences what it takes the movie 20 minutes to convey.

A before and after of the Sonic redesign. The left picture is nightmare-inducing, while the right one is kind of cute and way closer to the video game version we’ve come to know.

Now’s probably a good time to say that I’m not a Jim Carrey fan. I haven’t been since I was around 15. He has a schtick, and it’s been insanely lucrative for him over the course of his lengthy career, but I just grew out of it. That’s not to say I dismiss him entirely. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is one of my favorite films of all time. He had quality, nuanced performances in both Man on the Moon and The Majestic. I enjoy his performances when he takes risks, but unfortunately he rarely does. If you’re a Carrey completist, and haven’t grown tired of him doing the same thing he’s done over and over since his time on In Living Color, then you’ll definitely enjoy this movie more than I did. Honestly, this movie is a great vehicle for him to really lean into that wacky slapstick persona that’s made him a household name worldwide. It’s just not for me.

Jim Carrey goes full Jim Carrey in his turn as Dr. Robotnik, known to fans of the original video game as Dr. Eggman.

All in all, Sonic the Hedgehog is a run-of-the-mill kids’ movie. It’s nothing special. It’s nothing groundbreaking. In the wasteland of movies based on video games, I guess it’s one of the better ones. It’s certainly better than the trash heap that was Super Mario Bros. (RIP Bob Hoskins and Dennis Hopper. You deserved better.) It’s probably the only time a Sonic property has beat out a Mario property, a feat Sega has been trying to achieve over Nintendo for 30 years. It’s a step in the right direction for video game adaptations, but it’s completely forgetful. The characters are stock, the plot is predictable, the premise is ridiculous, and the jokes are cheesy. A big saving grace for this movie is the special effects, which are pretty eye-popping, so if a kid drags you to see it, you might as well catch it in Dolby or IMAX.

There isn’t a full-on spoiler section this time, because there aren’t enough surprises worth writing about. I’m not here to waste your time, so let’s get straight to 5 Quick Hits (spoilers ahead).

There are a couple of legitimately cool action scenes in this one. They just weren’t enough to make this a good movie.

5 Quick Hits

What the fuck was happening in that opening sequence? Since when does Sonic need some weird elaborate backstory where he’s adopted by an armored alien owl who protects him from a roving band of barbarian echidnas? And then what’s the point of having said protective owl get violently murdered in the first five minutes? We didn’t even get a chance to emotionally connect to the owl before its demise. It seemed really out of place for a kids’ movie. At least when Disney kills off parental figures, it’s earned. Whatever.
I’m not gonna lie. I was surprised when Tails popped up in the mid-credit scene. The powers that be at Paramount are apparently investing heavily and diving headlong into the Sonic franchise in hopes of creating their own cinematic universe. Every movie studio needs one these days, it seems. Tails is cute, but boring as hell though, so wake me up when we get the Knuckles standalone film.
James Marsden has had an interesting career. He might be a decent actor, but he really hasn’t been able to stretch his legs. The most dramatic role I’ve seen him in was during his stint on Westworld. He got his part cut from Once Upon a Time… in Hollywood, but if he was good enough for Quentin Tarantino to cast him, he must have some chops. That said, this movie would’ve been way better if Paul Rudd was in the leading human role, as was rumored during preproduction.
The soundtrack was pretty damn good. A lot of catchy hip-hop with high-energy beats. It made up for the lack of pace in the plot in some cases.
Natasha Rothwell is the unsung hero of this movie. She’s legitimately funny as the bitchy, cynical, skeptical sister who is constantly driving a wedge between James Marsden and his fiancé. I wished there was more of her in the movie.